cooking dinner is hard

here's how 12 readers approach it

There’s a viral clip of an interview with Aretha Franklin where a reporter asks her, “What are the biggest challenges for you?” She replies: “Trying to figure out what to cook for dinner nightly, ya know? Just night after night. What is it going to be tonight?”

Same, Aretha. Same.

We’d add that not only do we have to decide what’s for dinner, we then have to cook it, sometime between work, housework, exercise, carpool, homework, sports practice, bedtime routines, etc.

Over the years, we’ve learned a lot about how you all approach cooking dinner. We know some of you meal prep on Sunday, some of you cook while the baby’s napping, some of you whip up dinner right when you get home from work. But we wanted to know more! We love hearing how other people do life — we are constantly picking our friends’ brains to learn how they make their homes and family systems and businesses run. If a person has some wisdom, we want to hear it!

So today we’re peeking inside 12 What to Cookers’ kitchens, to learn when and how they cook dinner in the midst of busy schedules. From a single gal who works long days in a clinic to dual-working parents with multiple kids, and beyond, we hope you can relate to and/or learn from them as much as we did!

1. Becky from Raleigh, North Carolina: We are a family of three, and our son has sports or Boy Scouts six days a week. We eat home-cooked dinners six nights a week, and have one fun takeout night. We LIVE on what we call “two nighters” — we cook enough of a meal that we eat the leftovers (as is, not repurposed in a different dish) on the second night. I make two “two-nighters” that cover four dinners, and my husband covers the other two dinners with his own “two-nighter.” We both do our cooking totally solo to allow each other the room to do other things during that time. We cook right before we eat on the nights we’re cooking, though I am a huge fan of afternoon prep, such as chopping veg or making any accompanying sauces.

2. Allie from Houston, Texas: I’m a single, 30-something nurse working an 8-5 clinic job. I grocery shop Saturday mornings (always treat myself to a fun drink!) and then cook my lunches and dinners for the week on Sunday. I usually make a soup and then a bulk protein (like shredded chicken or pork loin) that I can use in bowls or salads to change things up. I love Caro’s good-all-week salads! Through the week, I heat my meals up before eating and add little toppings of cilantro and lime to make things fresh again. I’m starting to host a Sunday evening dinner this year for a group of seven friends and am starting a new job that will have me working from home two days a week — so excited to change up my cooking schedule and try new recipes for a group! (How fun, Allie! Here are some entertaining menus for you to try!)

3. Heather from Charlotte, North Carolina: My two boys play travel soccer so most of our meals are on the go! I do plan what we need to make each day based on where everyone will be and who will actually be home to eat. When we are all home for dinner I try to make something “real” instead of “quick.”

If you also eat many meals on the go, check out these prep-ahead dinners that travel well! And if you’re a meal prepper like Allie (or would like to be), see our guide to meal prep and index of good-all-week salads.

4. Allison from Jackson, Wyoming: I menu plan in advance based on our schedule for the week and then hit up the grocery store to buy what’s on my list (and try to avoid impulse snack purchases!). It’s just the two of us so I try to be thoughtful about using ingredients in multiple recipes and I always plan to eat leftovers for lunch, sometimes reimagined as a warm bowl or salad. I also try to take advantage of the Crock-Pot on super busy days so I can set it up in the morning before work and we can eat quickly that evening.

5. Elizabeth from Vermont: I’m usually the cook, but during weeks when I’m on a big deadline for work — I have a novel coming out next fall — my husband uses your meal plans. He grocery shops on a Sunday with your list and makes dinner every night when I go to pick up our 3-year-old from daycare. I get to hang with her and decompress while he follows your marching orders. The best part? Caro tells him what to do, and I don’t have to! It’s been the best thing for our marriage. Should we start a movement? (Yes, Elizabeth, we should — and congrats on your upcoming book!)

6. Anonymous from NYC: I typically cook a 30 minute or less meal for weeknights. I plan my full week on Saturday with grocery delivery on Sunday. I try to prep some veg on Sunday (chop, cook, etc.) and then on the couple of days I WFH I will prep mid-day during lunch break. I am always alone in the kitchen (this is my preference, everyone leave me alone!). The WTC meal plans have been a godsend in helping me prep for the week!

Have you cooked January’s really simple meal plan yet?! Find all of our meal plans here.

7. Holland from Laguna Hills, California: I follow the “prep ahead” instructions and do everything the night before after the kids go to bed and while listening to a good audiobook. My kids act like they will starve if they don’t eat by 5:30 and I get home from work at 5:15, so this lets my husband help get dinner on the table!

8. Anna from Brooklyn, New York: We’ve been doing the kid dinner/grown-up dinner thing for a long time, but my kids are getting old enough (6 and 8) that I’m over it! For the past few months, I’ve been making a concerted effort to cook a true family meal at least a few times a week — something we’ll all sit down and eat at the same time, even if some of us are eating deconstructed/sauce-free versions. I’m lucky to work from home and set my own schedule (I’m a personal trainer and the author of the newsletter How to Move), and on cooking days I try to wrap up by about 4:00. That way I have enough time to decide what to cook and pop by the grocery store even if I didn’t think ahead and do meal planning and shopping on the weekend. I listen to music, set the table, and by the time the kids get home from after-school and my husband finishes work at around 5:45, I try to have things ready so we can all just chill and enjoy the time together. It’s been going really well, aside from all the times it doesn’t go well at all. That’s parent life, I guess!

9. Anonymous from Indianapolis, Indiana: Two full-time working parents and two picky kids — ages 4 and 7. I typically have about 30 to 45 minutes to get dinner together when I get home from work with the kids before they get hangry around 6 (my husband is not usually home at this time). I put on the TV to distract kids and pull something together — more often than I’d like some kind of “snacky dinner” of convenience foods or leftovers plus fruit. A couple of times a week I actually cook a more substantial meal (this is where Caro’s recipes might come in), or I make something for my husband and I after kids go to bed. On occasional days I work from home, I try to start or cook meals in the early afternoon before I pick up kids. It’s chaos!

   1. From Molly from What To Cook: I relate to this chaos so much! Every day is a little different for us based on our kids’ sports practices, my husband’s and my work deadlines, and how on it (or not!) I was with meal planning over the weekend. But everyone gets fed every night, whether it’s a WTC recipe that we all sit down and eat together, or pizza delivery that we eat in shifts based on who gets home when!

10. Angela from New Mexico: My husband and I alternate weeks for meal planning and cooking. We’ve been doing this for years and it’s so helpful in distributing the mental and physical load.

11. Vanessa from the Chicago Metro Area: On WFH days, I try to do a lot of mise en place before it’s actually time to cook with three kids underfoot — huge sheet pan, tons of bowls, measured and mixed sauces if applicable, using my judgement to keep certain things refrigerated. USDA would probably not approve, but I’m OK with the gamble if it means I can cook a meal for everyone.

12. Noël from Media, PA: I try to start cooking at 4 p.m. to make it leisurely. With five kids running around it isn't always calm, but I like to put on some Ella Fitzgerald music, pour a little wine, and take my time putting dinner together.

We love how everyone’s routines are so different! Some of our favorite takeaways: two-nighter meals, post-bedtime audiobook cookathons, snack dinners, fun-drink Saturday morning grocery shopping, alternating cooking WEEKS with your partner, Ella Fitzgerald background tunes, USDA guideline gambling, and chaotic cooking.

Share your routine in the comments — and let us know if you like this “community wisdom” roundup and want to see more like it!

1. My latest recipe, the Vietnamese chicken noodle chop, is a truly ideal prep-ahead lunch. Carve out 40 minutes (max!) to cook it, and set yourself up with three to four days worth of nutritious and delicious lunches that you can eat straight from the fridge. And don’t write the recipe off if it’s frigid where you live or you’re gearing up for snow! WTCer Andrea said: “Made yesterday, so good. We had a ton of leftovers and it is a snowy cold day today so I didn’t want anything cold. Heated it up for lunch, just as is and it tastes like an outstanding Thai restaurant noodle dish!”

2. On Monday we shared a winter vacation house meal plan. It’s great for a winter vacation house rental, yes, but it’s equally great for any winter week at home! It’s also full of recipes that would make excellent “two nighters.”

3. The winter months can be a wild time, especially when you're the parent of amazing (and germy) little kids. We’re like a row of dominoes — when one of us starts feeling off, the rest of us follow. Needed’s Immune Support is part of our daily routine for everyday wellness. It’s a pregnancy, nursing, and kid-safe powder that’s packed with antioxidant-rich zinc and elderberry, as well as prebiotics and postbiotics (a huge part of your immune system is actually located in your gut!). The big boys, George, and I try to stir it into water every morning, and I now stir some into yogurt for Tav, as recommended by the founders (who are moms!). Click here to get 25% off a subscription (the discount will be auto-applied at checkout).¹ PS, I also took Needed’s Prenatal Multi while pregnant with Tav (and Cash)!

Every week, we dig into the What to Cook archives to see what we were cooking this time in years past. Here’s this week’s lineup of seasonal meals!

1. saucy chicken and cabbage satay bowls, 2025

This is very much a “beige food is the best food” situation. Ground chicken gets cooked down with cabbage and chopped mushrooms, then turns glossy and saucy with soy sauce, fish sauce, peanut butter, and a splash of coconut milk. It’s weeknight fast (takes about 30 minutes), low effort (hello, pre-sliced mushrooms and bagged coleslaw), flexible (serve it over rice or on its own), and freezable (future you will be so grateful!).

2. rosemary garlic pork shoulder with sweet potato puree, 2024

This one is both super impressive and almost completely hands off. You rub a pork shoulder with rosemary, garlic, brown sugar, and salt, then slow roast it alongside sweet potatoes. The pork drippings and potatoes blend together into a savory sweet potato purée, and you’ll finish it off with a bright chimichurri-ish parsley-vinegar sauce to cut the richness. It’s a restaurant-quality meal that will likely supply you with leftovers that you can eat as is or transform into enchiladas later in the week.

3. coq au vin, kinda, 2023

Coq au vin vibes without the three-hour, Julia Child commitment. Cubed chicken cooks quickly, mushrooms get browned for deep flavor, and everything simmers in white wine with pearl onions and a splash of cream to make an incredibly rich, silky sauce. Spinach gets stirred in at the end so you get greens without making a separate salad, and you absolutely need some crispy bread (grilled or broiled) to sop it all up.

4. healthy-ish turkey bolognese, 2022

This is a “cook once, feed yourself for days” stock-the-freezer hero. Lean ground turkey and a mountain of sneaky veg (carrot, celery, onion, garlic, plus cauliflower rice) simmer into a thick, cozy sauce. Take it from Steph: “Found my leftovers in the freezer last week and Friday’s meal was fancy, delicious, AND easy!! I’ve never loved leftovers so much!”

5. chipotle cheddar chimichanga tacos, 2021

If you’ve never baked your tacos, might I suggest it? These chipotle beef (or turkey or chicken) tacos get stuffed with Cheddar, folded, and baked until the flour tortillas puff up and turn crispy/flaky like a chimichanga-meets-taco situation. You get three “sauces” — pink sauce, avocado crema, and salsa — plus a crisp Mexican street corn slaw salad for a side.

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1. Thank you to Needed for sponsoring today’s So Into That.